Just when you think that you finally found a successful online date on an online dating site, everything falls down after seeing them in your first offline date. It sure does feel like a trick if he turns out to be a mile away from what they portrayed online. Blame the mindset right now on social media that everything should be perfect. People nowadays are using all sorts of filters to make them look good online, and that is especially true for people who are looking for a partner.
You might be one of those too excited ones to meet your date and came in your dating place too early only to find out that you are waiting in vain. We do not understand what kind of pleasure these people get from making you wait but it sure is annoying.
Some people give up on online dating after a failed attempt and they go back to their normal busy lives. Dating over 40 for most singles can be hard. You are surrounded mostly by married colleagues, and if they are single, they are busy most of the time so online dating is the easiest route to go even though there are bumps along the way.
How are you going to give online dating another try after a failed offline date without feeling like wasting your time?
1. Avoid “Ghost Dates”
Some people say that they are ready to meet you but they disappear like a ghost once you are in the meeting place. It can be very stressful but you cannot do anything aside from cursing them. Most of them have things in common:
a. They are currently in a far-flung area.
i. Their profile says that they are near you but when the meeting day comes, they suddenly transported somewhere else and it will take some time for them to meet you.
b. A terrible accident happened to someone dear to them so they have to spend some money and they don’t have a penny for gas to be able to meet you. Most probably, they just need to take a peek at your wallet.
c. You agreed to meet today but they suddenly feel the need to know you more online through online chat and wanted an online romance first. That can take forever and has no plan at all to meet you. All he needs is an online sex. Most probably, this one is in a relationship. If they’re not in a relationship and will finally have the courage to meet in the future, you might have developed more and more assumptions that are far from reality.
2. Revisit your profile.
Maybe you are not clear enough on who you are searching for. Use your failed attempt to make your profile better by specifying what you like and don’t like in a person. It might turn off other people because you will come as a picky date but it will be a good filter for those you are searching.
3. Search for profiles instead of waiting for people to message you.
The best way to filter out is to see their profile for yourself. You will be able to read how they present themselves. Once you find someone that fits you, craft a message that will get them to respond. I have written a post on how to get your first YES on a dating site. Visit the post and follow the steps to get their attention.
4. Ask for a video call before the offline date.
This is a crucial step before the meet-up. Video lies less than photos. We cannot deny the fact that physical appearance is a big factor in online dating and video call can verify the person in the profile of your date. If physical appearance is not a big deal for you, it will be easier for you to tell if someone is lying through a video call. Request at least ten minutes of video call a day before the date. It should give you an ample time to decide to continue or to call it off.
Give online dating another try. Have a can-do attitude. Happiness will not come without a few disappointments. It should not be perceived as a waste of time, rather, an experience of meeting people and understanding them.